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-THE ISLAND LIFE-
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When you read about Cato or Marcus Aurelius, youâre struck by their extraordinary reserve. They were certainly friendly and kindâeven playful at times to those close to them. But with strangers, they kept a measured distance.
They were self-contained.
This quality was rare in Rome, and itâs even rarer today. We live in a world overflowing with over-sharers and gossips. People proudly flaunt their chaos, inviting not just a glimpse into their lives but a full immersion. Everywhere you look, there are busybodies, energy vampires, trolls, and toxic narcissists. It seems no one pauses to think before speaking, no one practices restraint. Social media has fostered an epidemic of poor boundaries, and with it, a culture marked by insecurity, low self-esteem, and a blurred sense of where one person ends and another begins.
So how can we establish better boundaries and a more confident sense of self like the Stoics? How can philosophy address our modern day struggles with communication, resilience, and relationships?
By living philosophically, she said, we can learn to handle anything. It was philosophy that created an inner citadel within Marcus and Cato, it was philosophy that protected them from all the pushback and attacks on their character. If youâre willing to engage with the process of philosophy, the same can be true for you. As Jennifer said,
You become tough enough to withstand anything they say [about you] because youâve already come to appreciate what youâre here for, what makes you decent, that youâve approved of the things youâve done. It just eliminates a lot of the possibility for you of feeling ashamed.
The Stoics taught the importance of knowing oneâs place and path in life. They advised tuning out gossip, keeping a healthy distance from flawed influences, avoiding the trap of adopting othersâ bad habits. They championed reserve, dignity, and poiseâa steady detachment from the opinions of others.
This isnât easy. It demands real self-discipline. But this is also a foundation for true well-being, happiness, and, as seen in the lives of Marcus, Cato, and many other Stoics, the path to greatness.
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